Creed’s Scott Stapp’s ‘Marlins Will Soar’: Worst Sports Song of All Time?

Scott Stapp looks like a baseball fan.

I feel like I’ve let you down. Last week I heard Dan Patrick and his minions making fun of the newest sports anthem, “Marlins Will Soar” by Creed frontman Scott Stapp. I should have posted it immediately, while it was fresh on my mind.

Now, unfortunately, if you go to the YouTube site, all you will see is “This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by MLB Advanced Media.” I guess since they use the song in the Marlins’ pregame video, it technically belongs to the MLB.

Luckily for us, some fan (either of the Marlins, or Creed, or copyright infringement) saved the day by posting this bootleg video. Not the best quality, but at least you can hear the magic.

Is it just me, or does it really sound like he’s saying “You Will Suck”?

To clarify, I sought out the song’s lyrics, and luckily some kind soul posted them in all their not-quite-baseball-lingo glory:

“Marlins Will Soar”

Let’s play ball, it’s game day
We watch strikeouts, base hits, double plays
Take the field, hear the roar of the crowd
Come on Marlins, make us proud
Come on Marlins, make us proud

Keep hoping and dreaming and you will soar
With a little faith and luck, you will soar

One strike, two strikes, swing away
A diving catch, a stolen base
A perfect game, a triple play
A [undistinguishable] play of praise
We’re series champs, we [crack of bat?]

Keep hoping and dreaming and you will soar
With a little faith and luck, you will soar

Keep hoping and dreaming and you will soar
With a little faith and luck, you will soar

As you can see, Stapp basically threw together a series of baseball terms with no real coherence or logical progression. It would be like me trying to make a song about cooking and singing:

“Bread, paremesan, and filet,
We like to eat you all day.
Leeks, bon-bons, Golden Grahams,
Need to get some in my hands.”

Sure, the words are technically food, but anyone who understood cooking would think it was wrong and ridiculous.

That’s pretty much the main reason why this song is so awful. Even “Centerfield” by John Fogerty at least makes some sense: “put me in coach, I’m ready to play.” I think I’ve said that one before on the field.

So Stapp could could have produced the worst sports song of all time, but just for fun we’ll take a look at some other terrible ones in the next couple days.

You better believe this will be on the list (and yes, this was the song my high school basketball team came out to). Hey, at least Master P played basketball:

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